I had to hold on, what choice did I have? What else was there in this life? It’s the only thing that keeps me stable, that keeps me functioning without losing my mind. I have to hold on. I have to.
Waking up everyday is hard enough, but to do it alone, I don’t think I’ll survive. Between the existential crisis and anxiety, there is no room left for instability.
But it’s not easy, holding on when you want to give up and run so fast that your feet can’t keep up. It isn’t easy at all, always hustling, always striving, never resting or enjoying anything. Knowing that there are bigger problems in the world and yet being so self obsessed that only mine seem to matter.
This is why I have to hold on, because all these things will defeat me otherwise. It’s the only way I can stay in the game without losing.
Thank you for reading.